Happy Father’s Day

Today is Father’s Day in North America.

Happy Father’s Day to all you good souls!

Here’s a short-ish piece about the man I am fortunate to call my father (tata).

Earlier this month, my tata celebrated 50 years since arriving in Canada.

I called him on the anniversary.

On the call, I asked him:

If you could do it all again, would you do it? Would you move to Canada?

His reply, without hesitation:

Yes.

I don’t know what I was expecting to hear.

But when I heard him say: ‘Yes,’ I had a moment.

In that ‘yes,’ I heard him say yes to the following:

My mother. His children. His family. His work. His faith.

I heard him say yes to the laughter and love.

I heard him say yes to the sadness, the grief, the struggle.

I heard him say yes to his choices.

I heard him say yes to the things he values.

I heard him say yes to a life he is proud of.

My father arrived in Canada on June 2, 1974.

A few weeks later, he was employed by a CNC machine company.

He was employed in his trade. And probably spoke no English at the time.

Very impressive.

My mother arrived on Christmas Day of 1974.

My parents married two months later.

Nine months later, I was born.

Also, very impressive. Ha!

Five years later, my brother Filip arrived, and two years later, my brother Luka arrived.

I loved the family my parents had created.

I recall asking my mama for more brothers.

I liked the two I had and felt it would have been awesome to have more of them.

At the time, I didn’t know what went into having children, so I didn’t understand why having more Filips and Lukas might not be an option.

Over the years, I have watched my tata put his heart and soul into his family, faith, and work. I have watched him put his heart and soul into the things he values.

And I will be honest, there were times, as an adult, when that has been difficult to process.

Not because I am an ungrateful daughter that needs to ramble.

But for years, I put my heart and soul into things that I thought I valued, and well, it just didn’t add up.

This is mostly because I had never asked myself a pretty basic question: What do I value? And how do I live a life in alignment with those values? (Okay, that’s two questions.)

And from how I see things, It looks like my tata had asked himself these questions and set out on a life with those questions in mind.

Some of the Čuvalo clan including his mama, my Baba Iva (top row, middle). My mama, tata and me on the far right.

Because my tata has lived a life in alignment with his values, I am here, on this planet, and in Croatia, musing about my tata and his choices.

And I am grateful.

I am grateful that he said yes to Canada 50 years ago.

I am grateful that he would say yes again if given the chance.

Yes to:

My mama. His children. His family. His work. His faith.

And, on this Father’s Day, I am so grateful that I finally got it.

Or, at the very least, I am starting to get it.

The importance of living a life in alignment with my values (which included asking myself those two basic questions: What do I value? And how do I live a life in alignment with those values?).

While it has taken some time to get ‘here,’ I thank my Tata for showing me what he values and living a life in alignment with those values.

I am grateful that my tata said yes to Canada, Mama, his children, his faith, and his work.

I am proud to be his daughter.

I am grateful that I am part of his legacy.

Happy Father’s Day to my tata, Mate Čuvalo.

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